Aces Feign Weakness in 9-4 "Loss"

After a pair of convincing wins in their previous two games, the Black Aces HC decided to play dead for the Wyse Guys this past wednesday. Laying the foundations for the upcoming playoffs, the Aces handed the WGs a 9-4 decision, thereby instilling a false sense of confidence in the red squad and in the Warriors and Battlers (who had left scouts behind to take in the late game). 

With the regular season standings firmly under their control, the Aces squad took their foot off the gas and coasted to non-victory. The post-game chit-chat barely mentioned hockey at all, so unconcerned were the blackshirt players. Friendly non-hockey banter was the order of the day as the Aces sipped on imported beer, answered blackberrys, compared plans for the weekend and kept each other up to date on the latest ski conditions in Utah, Colorado and B.C. All far more important than ruminating on the game, apparently. 

In preparation for the playoffs, key Aces personnel were engaged in important missions away from the rink. Since opposing team players are unlikely to read this blog, we can safely reveal the nature of those missions:

Art W - is in southeast Asia securing a large quantity of bull semen for pre-game injections for all Aces players. This will ensure that our energy levels are always at a high level. Just how Art is securing that bull semen is between him and the bulls, but for now the team motto is "don't ask, don't tell".

Brian M - is on Easter Island on a quest for the lost amulet of M'tahqltzl, said to give those who possess it the strength of 100 men. This is allegedly how the primitive island society was able to carve and erect those enormous stone statues. If Brian fails on that quest, he has been instructed to bring home a large quantity of Chilean sea bass instead. It won't help the team, but it will make for a nice post-game dinner.

Andrew T - is being fitted for a bionic arm to replace the one he lost last week in an unfortunate skate-swinging incident. We will be keeping the old arm on the bench during the playoffs to help handle the gate on line changes.

Joe H - is on a mission to fly some Tibetan prayer flags from Camp 3 on Everest in time for the start of the playoffs. Since the weather on Everest during March is apparently 'challenging', his plan B involves flying 6 pairs of girls' panties from the front flap of his tent. How that helps the team Joe would not say, but we do appreciate the effort.

One more regular season game next week, boys. Don't forget to have your non-hockey conversational topics ready for after the game - there have recently been some unfortunate instances of players bringing up actual game events in the post-game discussion groups. This contravenes the team charter, section 8 paragraph 6ii, "Acceptable Subjects for Post-Game Discussion" which clearly states that 'no player shall mention any play, non-play, instance or occurrence from the game just played' during the apres game cooldown. You have been warned.