Pre-Approved Pre-Game Conversation Starters for Aces

Phil White Arena Smoking Room

In their most recent COTHL match, local hockey club the Black Aces came up on the short end of a 5-2 score against arch-rivals the Battlers. Players and close observers of the beloved team noted that the pre-game dressing room banter, normally lively and spirited, was on this day somewhat lacklustre.

Was the lack of witty repartee somehow related to the Aces’ sub-par on-ice performance? Possibly. But the team is not taking any chances.

In an effort to remedy this possibly dire state of affairs, Aces senior management has compiled a list of topics designed to spark pre-game conversation amongst active players, with the aim of inspiring the team to put in a better effort on the ice.

Instructions

• Aces players are to be in the room no less than 20 minutes before game time.
• Players should split into 2 groups: forwards in one group, defensemen and goaltenders (Pete T is considered a part-time goaltender) in another.
• One topic per game for each group is to be drawn at random from the puck bag

Topics

For Forwards

“Is light beer really beer?”
“How much can you bench?”
“What’s better, a Ford F150 or a Dodge Ram?”
“Vegas: just like fucking Disneyland now with all the families and kids and shit”
“Heart vs Zeppelin: who rocks harder?”
“Zamboni Girl: would ya hit that?”

For Defensemen & Goaltenders

“Bordeaux versus Provence wine regions: compare and contrast”
“Asteroid impacts and the end of the last ice age: discuss this theory in depth”
“Which do you think drives better, the Aston Martin Superleggera or the Aston Martin Vantage?”
“Monaco: not what it used to be now that commoners and footballers are permitted to enter”
“Puccini vs Mozart: who wrote the greatest opera?”
“Zamboni Girl: would ya hit that?