Double Victory for the Aces

The Black Aces kept their undefeated streak alive in their latest game, pulling out a 4-4 tie against arch rivals the Wyse Guys. This means the Aces have not lost in their last 10 games going back to their triumphant 2014-2015 season, including the playoffs. A pair of goals for power forward Mark plus one each for Ralph and Mike were enough to get over some weird goals that got past Aces' netminder John.

New man Alex finally was granted permission from all 6 of his girlfriends to attend the game and put in a solid game on D.

In related news, the Aces somehow took the St Paul's riding in the Federal election tonight, edging out the Liberal, NDP and CPC candidates even though they didn't run a campaign and were not supposed to be on the ballot. A perplexed Peter Mansbridge contacted the Aces' spokesman and professional chai wallah Aubrey after the votes were counted.

PM - Hello Aubrey. Can you please explain to Canadians, and especially to the people the Toronto riding of St Paul, just how the Black Aces - do i have that right? - pulled off this unexpected victory.

Aubrey - I'm sorry Peter, reception here in Kerala is not so great tonight. Also, I'm drunk. But I'm proud of the guys for running a great campaign.

PM - But that's just it, there was no campaign. No one can explain how they even got on the ballot. How do you explain it?

Aubrey - Sorry Peter, I have to go. I'm just about to dig into a really nice plate of aloo gobi and palak paneer. Go Aces!

Cut to: INTERIOR, A GIRLS BEDROOM. A LARGE 30-SOMETHING WOMAN IS FLOPPED ON THE BED, WRITING IN A DIARY. SHE IS WEARING WORK BOOTS AND TRACK PANTS UNDER A LUMBERJACKET AND A HAND-DRAWN BLACK ACES T-SHIRT.

Dear Diary, it's been months since I got fired from my sweet zamboni driving job at Phil White Arena, but I have spent that time wisely and tonight it all paid off. The Aces pulled off a victory in the election tonight, all because of me. And speaking of pulling things off, sure I had to go on a lot of 'dates' with a lot of guys (and the occasional girl) to lock up those votes but it was worth it. Now my Aces' crush will go out with me for sure, right after he removes that restraining order. I just know it. 
Go Aces!

David Price Will be Ready on Wednesday

I am so ready.

Controversy is still swirling in T.O. after today's big Jays win over Texas in game 4 of the ALDS, as the team's starting pitching rotation seems up in the air. Ace David Price went into the game to relieve R.A. Dickey in the 5th inning with the Jays ahead 7-1, giving up 3 runs and 6 hits on 50 pitches.

The big question now is whether Price will be ready to play again on wednesday, with only 2 days rest. Jays' coach John Gibbons says Price will not be ready to go on wednesday. "No way" said Gibbons after the game "There's just not enough time for David to recover from today's game."

David Price on the other hand has other ideas for this coming wednesday. Here's a transcript of his post-game interview with SportsNet's Barry Davis.

SN "David, the coach says you are definitely not going to be pitching in game 5. What do you think of that decision?"
DP "Oh I'll be ready, don't you worry."
SN "So you think 2 days rest is enough recovery time?"
SP "Absolutely. I'll be lacing them up on the forward line with Mark and Ralph this wednesday. I can't wait."
SN "Mark and Ralph..."
DP "That's right. First line all the way. Go Aces!"
SN "What are you even talking about?"
SP "The Black Aces, man. My favourite beer league hockey team. I love those guys and I can't wait to hit the ice with them. I mean, there's no way in hell I'll be able to throw a baseball by wednesday so this is my chance to skate with the Aces. I'm really glad the coach put me in the game today, otherwise I'd have to start game 5 for the Jays."
SN "I didn't even know you could skate, David."
DP "I can't. Yet. I've got 48 hours to learn though. How hard can it be? Joe Himalaya promised me he'd loan me his skates, he's going to be off in Australia for the World Shark Wrestling Championships so he won't need them. Thanks Joe!"

In less startling news, the Aces pulled off their third consecutive win in their most recent game, downing the Bloor Battlers 4-2 in a game that featured more than a few penalties and an impromptu lesson in How to Dive by Aces diving instructor Pete S. Another solid game in the nets from John (can someone please get him a new Aces sweater? He's earned it) plus goals from Mark (2), Joe D-S and Ralph and the Battlers were done. The Aces are now a perfect 3-0 on the season.

Тузы Добро пожаловать Новый игрок

Zamboni Girl encourages the Aces as they prepare to open up several cans of whoop-ass on the Wyse Guys.

Local hockey team the Black Aces continued to roll into the 2015-2016 season in the W column this past week as they held on to defeat a determined Warriors squad 4-3. Goals by Mark, Joe, Aubrey and Pete S were enough to offset the Warriors and a questionable slapshot no-goal + penalty = Warriors goal.

The Aces D was in fine form too, especially with the return of Gerry, Simon and pirate-in-training Al, all missing from Game 1. Maybe too fine? New goalie and former Aces stalker John is already so comforatable behind the Aces D that he has begun experimenting with new and novel ways to corral shots coming from beyond the centre red line. He still hasn't perfected his technique but the rest of the Aces are looking forward to more of John's hilariously creative "puckstopping" over the course of the 2015-2016 season.

In other big news, the Aces are set to welcome the newest addition to an already foridable lineup: Alex K, formerly of the Russian Federation and now working towards a Canadian citizenship. Pro tip, Alex - don't wear a niqab when you take the oath, it upsets the locals.

A little bio info about the newest Ace

Name: Alex K
Age:   40 plus a day
Former occupations:

• personal bodyguard to Vladimir Putin
• bear trainer
• MIG fighter pilot
• reindeer salesman

Some say this day was actually foretold in prophecy. Russian and Canadian scholars continue to debate this, but this 1923 painting by Russian master Wassily Kandinsky clearly depicts Alex in a Black Aces sweater helping the team to vanquish their COTHL rivals.

This is obviously a scene from Phil White Arena

Alex, the Aces are no strangers to Things That Are Russian. You can catch up on some of that history in these vintage blog posts:

• Russian Federation annexes Black Aces
• Aces Training Program Pays Dividends
• Aces Hacked by Russian Cyber Criminals

Another late game this week, this time against the Battlers. Победы!!